


If I Can’t Have You

by kingsofeverything (FullOnLarrie)



Category: One Direction (Band), Shawn Mendes - Fandom
Genre: Friends to Lovers, M/M, Masturbation, Planned Voyeurism, Smut, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-19
Updated: 2019-05-19
Packaged: 2020-02-26 22:57:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,508
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18726550
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FullOnLarrie/pseuds/kingsofeverything
Summary: Shawn is tired of being so obvious about his feelings. Songs, words, gifts. Nothing gets his message across.In a last ditch effort to gain Niall’s attention, Shawn follows some advice from a nosy mutual friend.(Co-starring Louis & Harry)





	1. Shawn and Niall

**Author's Note:**

> I don't know! I wrote Shiall! But chapter 2 is Louis and Harry, so I didn't stray far :D
> 
> Title is obviously the title of Shawn's song that he sent to Niall with a TAPE PLAYER.
> 
>  
> 
> [Fic post for sharing the Shiall :D](https://kingsofeverything.tumblr.com/post/185208299620/if-i-cant-have-you-by-fullonlarrie)

“Oh my god, this is the worst.” Shawn groans, leaning back and pinching the bridge of his nose. His chair creaks as he shifts his weight. “I’m so obvious.”

“I mean, I agree.” Harry says, spearing a shrimp with his fork and pointing it at Shawn. “If the lyrics weren’t blatantly about him, I’d say sending him, _and only him,_ a personalized gift box with a fucking vintage tape player and the song on cassette drives the point home.”

“You’d think, but I swear… Did you see him open it?”

“Yeah, it was cute.” Harry scrunches his nose and Shawn thinks about Niall’s loud laugh, the one he lets loose sometimes when they Skype. 

“He doesn’t get it.”

“Yeah… No. He has no clue. But like, I think he’d be into it. You just have to… make the first move.”

“I don’t know. I think maybe he sees me as a kid, you know? I mean, he called me ‘the essence of innocence’ in that one press thing.” 

“That was like a year ago. Right after that one picture of you where like, even the people in the background are disgusted at how obvious you two are. That’s when I started shipping you.” Harry lowers his voice conspiratorially, “I’m glad you came to me about this.” Shawn frowns, trying to figure out if they’re both still living in the universe where Harry appeared in his pool that afternoon. Still it’s mesmerizing when Harry sighs, eyes half closed, and says, “I _love_ love.”

“I know. Now what am I going to do?” 

“When are you seeing him again?”

“Said he’s coming to all my California dates.” Shawn’s face warms and he rubs at the tip of his nose. “So my first night at the Staples Center.”

Harry taps his finger against his lips. “Okay, so until then I need you to do a few things for me.”

The favors turn out to be easy at first. He makes sure he’s shirtless every time he talks to Niall, even FaceTimes him from the gym one morning and from the hotel pool one night. It doesn’t seem to make a difference—Niall still rambles on about golf—but he does it anyway.

The second part, well… It’s never crossed his mind to ‘wank like someone is watching’. And the idea takes some getting used to, but he adds it to his routine. He jerks off every day but Sunday, and on the nights he performs, he does what he’s come to think of as a rehearsal of sorts and gets himself off on the couch in his dressing room in front of a mirror. By the time his first night in LA at the Staples Center rolls around, Shawn is feeling pretty good about his upcoming performance. 

Harry hasn’t shut up in their WhatsApp chat, but it’s okay. He has running commentary on the whereabouts of his… Well, he doesn’t know what Niall is, but he knows what he wants him to be. 

He’s been assured that no one else will come near his dressing room. Harry has stationed his own bodyguard at the end of the hall and Louis around the corner to provide enough of a distraction once things get started. And Harry’s planned this down to the smallest detail. Shawn’s impressed against his will and briefly wonders what his surprises for Louis are like. He lays on the couch, facing away from the door, watching the sliver of hallway that he can see reflected in the cleverly positioned mirror near his feet. 

On the little table beside him is a small bottle of lube and his lucky guitar pick. He lifts the pick to his lips, kisses the NH, and sets it down, shoving his pants to his knees and getting comfortable. After drizzling lube in one hand, Shawn rucks his shirt up, holding it with his chin and pinching his nipples while he slicks up his half-hard cock. If things are going according to plan, then Niall should be outside his door any second now.

“Right, man!” Niall shouts, but his voice sounds further away, near the end of the hall. He must be talking to Louis. 

Shawn tries to settle into his routine, throwing his head back against the pillow on the arm of the couch. He circles his fingers around the base of his dick and squeezes, holding it up and out from his body so it looks longer. It’s possible he’s imagining things, but he thinks he hears a hiss from the doorway, so he slowly starts to stroke himself. 

In the distance he hears his band practicing “If I Can’t Have You” and moves his fist to the beat unintentionally. When he realizes what he’s doing, he stops and drags his hand slowly up and down the shaft, swiping his thumb over the slit with a shiver. He’s so thankful that he practiced this or he’d have already shot his load. It’s a close call when he looks up at the mirror and sees Niall’s hungry gaze watching him. 

Knowing that he has a rapt audience, Shawn starts to put on more of a show; wiggling and moaning, pinching and twisting his nipples, bucking his hips up, thrusting into his fist. He reaches down to roll his balls in the palm of his hand and tugs, smirking when he sees Niall’s reflection licking his lips. 

“Fuck, yeah.” Shawn jerks himself faster, his orgasm just out of reach. “Oh, oh, ohhhh, Niall!” Hips stuttering out of control, he comes, shooting all over his stomach, but not missing the bitten off moan from the hallway. The absolute scariest part of Harry’s favor is next, and he’s not sure if he can do it, but he makes himself get up, pull his pants over his ass, and walk away from the door and into the bathroom. He finishes cleaning himself and debates giving up completely when his phone buzzes on the counter. 

_**Harry**_ : Niall watched you wank!

 _ **Shawn**_ : I know! Where is he?

 _ **Harry**_ : In your dressing room. He freaked out by the way. I think maybe he forgot you had a cock.

 _ **Shawn**_ : Shit. Is he ok?

 _ **Harry**_ : He’s fine! Maybe a little nervous. 

_**Shawn**_ : That makes both of us. 

After Harry wishes him luck, Shawn pockets his phone and walks back into his dressing room. The door is properly shut. And Niall is sitting on the chair in the corner. Not the couch where he usually flops around until Shawn offers to rub his feet or scratch his scalp. 

“Hi.” Shawn waves across the room for lack of anything better to do. 

“Hey, Shawnie.” Niall winces and looks at him through half closed eyes. “Listen, um… I need to talk to you. But like, after the show? Don’t want to be rushed for time.”

“Oh.” Shawn bites his lower lip and pushes his hair off his face. “Is something wrong?”

“No, no, definitely not.” Niall shakes his head and looks down at his lap. He takes a deep breath and lifts his chin, meeting Shawn’s eyes. “In fact, um… I know you have a place here in LA and like another show tomorrow night, but would you want to come over tonight. You know, after? We could talk then.”

Shawn crosses the room to stand just a few feet away from him, wanting to hug him hello after going months without seeing each other, but he can wait if he has to. “Yeah, I’d like that. Can we order sushi?” 

“’Course.” Niall stands and while he’d normally take a step back, afraid of getting too close, this time he doesn’t. 

“So it’s nothing bad you want to talk about? Good stuff?”

Studying him, eyes dancing, Niall says, “Could be. Could be really good.”

“Okay.” Shawn nods and bends down to grab his lucky guitar pick, holding it up for Niall to see. “Kiss my lucky pick?”

Niall grins and rolls his eyes, but he purses his lips and lets Shawn press the plastic to his mouth. When he finally takes it away and slips it in his pocket, Niall says, “Need anything else? You’re due on stage in a few.”

“Just, um…” Shawn holds one finger up and closes the little bit of distance left between them, knocking his knuckles against Niall’s arms where they’re folded across his chest. “One more lucky kiss.”

“You got another pick?” Niall asks, frowning and looking around. 

“Not a pick. Me.” He taps his fingertips against his own lips, then gently touches Niall’s, and whispers, “Kiss me.”

Niall nods and leans in, and when their mouths meet, Shawn can feel him trembling. He tips his head and presses another, firmer kiss to Niall’s lips, and moves back, giggling when Niall chases his kiss. 

“Sushi at yours after the show. Just us?” Shawn asks hopefully. 

“Yeah. Just us,” Niall agrees eagerly. “I think maybe we both need to help Harry find a new hobby.” 

Shawn’s laughs and reaches up to straighten Niall’s glasses. “Definitely.”


	2. Louis and Harry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Harry gets a little caught up meddling in his friends' love lives and neglects Louis.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote the Shiall part and immediately thought of this, so I had to write it as a second chapter. Hope you like it!

“Babe, what’s on your phone that’s so important you can’t blow me?” Louis frowns down at Harry where he’s kneeling on the floor between Louis’ feet. Harry’s left hand half-heartedly strokes his own cock through the tight fabric of his black briefs, right hand cradling his phone as he types with his thumb. 

“Sorry, Lou, I…” Harry’s brow furrows and he shakes his head, typing with both hands this time.

He’s not paying attention at all. Louis clears his throat and makes a show of tucking his hard cock back inside his dark grey joggers, keeping his fist tight around it, jerking himself fast. “By all means, finish whatever it is you’re doing.”

Harry looks up at him with a pout. “No, Lou, let me—” Harry’s phone, still in his hand, dings and he glances down at it, but looks back to the stretch of the soft grey fabric of Louis’ joggers. “Let me suck you. Please.”

“Nope. No blow jobs for a week. Both ways.” Louis shakes his head and keeps wanking, the fleece inside his joggers rubbing against the tip of his cock as he moves his hand. “No rimming either. You’ve lost the privilege of your mouth on me for the next seven days.”

Harry gasps and clambers up onto the couch and into Louis’ lap, kneeing him in the stomach, and mumbling apologies as he knocks Louis’ hand out of the way and settles over Louis’ thighs. Lacing his fingers behind Louis’ head, Harry leans in and bumps their foreheads together, wincing. “Can’t put my mouth on you at all? What about kissing?”

Humming while he thinks about it, Louis pushes back into the couch cushion, forcing a sliver of space between them so that he can look Harry in the eye. “Scoot back.” 

Harry scoots his body back until he’s balanced right above Louis’ knees and Louis pushes the waist of his joggers back down, getting a hand back around himself. The second Harry reaches for Louis’ dick, Louis says, “Hands off.”

“No hands?” Harry squeaks.

“No touching right now.” Louis gets back into a rhythm, tipping his head up, murmuring, “No oral of any kind for a week.” He runs his hand up Harry’s thigh and over his chest, pinching his nipple once before sliding his hand up and twisting Harry’s short curls around his fingers. With a grip on his hair, Louis tilts Harry’s head and whispers directly into his ear, lips brushing against Harry’s skin. “No kissing on the mouth for a week.”

Louis pushes him back to give himself room and Harry whines, circling his hips uselessly, searching for friction but just barely grazing against the back of Louis’ knuckles as he fists his own cock. Watching through half closed eyes while Louis gets himself off, Harry says, voice slow, like he’s not sure exactly what he’s saying, “I can kiss you anywhere except your mouth. I can put my lips and tongue and teeth on any part of you except your mouth, dick, balls, and arsehole. Is that what you’re telling me?” 

The elastic waist of his joggers is snug against his balls, which are drawn up tight. Harry ducks his head to look at them. When Louis swipes his thumb across the tip of his dick, Harry pokes his tongue out, licking his lips, and Louis comes, dripping through his fingers onto his stomach. Chest heaving with his breath, Louis says, “Best stay away from the whole…” 

Harry swallows audibly, eyes locks on the mess on Louis’ stomach. “Do I get to come?”

“Yeah, just…” Louis pats Harry’s knee and points to the large window that looks out onto the garden. “Go stand over there.”

Hurrying to comply, Harry trips over the corner of the coffee table, but he catches himself, rubbing his hand over his shin when he gets there. 

“Turn and face the window. See your reflection?”

“Yeah…” 

“Good. Now, fuck your fist while you tell me what was so urgent that you couldn’t suck me properly.”

Louis wipes his hand on his t-shirt, then pulls it over his head, cleaning the rest of his come from his stomach and fingers. He lays back on the sofa so that he can see Harry in profile and gets comfortable, watching Harry push his underwear down and get a hand around his cock, shifting his body forward and backward while he attempts to explain, “I— I— You know how I ship Niall and Shawn?”

“Shiall. Sure.” Louis nods and crosses his arms. Maybe Harry’s been reading fan fiction again. Or writing it. 

“I’ve been—” Harry thumbs at the head of his cock and his hips buck forward. “I’ve been meddling.”

Quietly, Louis chuckles, not wanting to distract Harry now that he’s steadily humping into his own hand. “Meddling?”

“Yeah…” Harry sighs and lets his head fall back. “Niall needs to get his head out of his arse about Shawn because the pining is ridiculous. I came up with a plan so Shawn can show Niall that he’s not the same teenager he was when they first met.”

“Sounds familiar,” Louis says slowly, narrowing his eyes. “Does the plan involve him wanking somewhere Niall’s guaranteed to see?”

“Maybe.” Harry’s voice cracks. “Lou, can I—”

“You can come whenever you want, but don’t get any on the window.” Louis props himself up on his elbows to get a better look as Harry’s hand moves in a blur over his dick. The muscles in his arse flex and relax, tensing up and clenching tight when he comes. 

After Harry licks his fingers clean, he pulls up his briefs, and drops onto the sofa, wiggling between Louis’ legs and stretching his body out until he completely covers him. He pouts and leans in, pressing a kiss to Louis’ cheek. “Sorry. Got a little caught up in it. But if all goes according to plan, they’ll be together tomorrow night.”

Louis lifts his chin and kisses Harry between his eyebrows. “Just tell me what you need me to do.” 


End file.
